Reports of the demise of this blog are greatly exaggerated.
That said, many have commented on my general lack of visibility this week on all of the loading social networks: Twitter, Facebook, Illiterati and BrainFart.
Some folk assumed that I've been devoting my attention to Final Fantasy 13. This is a reasonable assumption, but incorrect.
Some others assumed that I've been totally snowed under at the office, with an immense and seemingly unachievable deadline ahead of me. This has the merit of being generally true, but again is not the reason for my absence.
As ever, the truth is far more interesting.
I've been participating in the finals of the World Hide-and-Seek Championships. Stranger yet, I was facing the trickiest of opponents; my best friend, iDifficult. I mean, I knew we were in opposite sides of the seeding, but what are the odds?
This years contest was thrown into chaos during the semi-final round when 'Difficult's opponent, the former U.N. Secretary General Javier Pérez de Cuéllar, defaulted after he concealed himself inside an industrial meat grinder in Reykjavik. The Peruvian ace had reasoned that the plug-less device was safe, and that nobody was likely to repair it in the near future*.
[* the Icelandic economy being what it is.]
Unfortunately, he was only half right.
The final was, unlike Pérez de Cuéllar, a two-legged affair. I was assigned to seek in the first leg, and hide in the second. Hoping for a quick victory, I'd done my homework, and knew how devious an opponent 'Difficult is. Earlier rounds found him: disguised as a bucket in a janitor's closet in Johannesburg; suspended from a vast kite above Hawaii; and - the best yet - inside a very large jar of mayonnaise in a Bangkok barber shop**.
[** He took a fortnight to find, and needed a lot of showering afterwards.]
The final started early on Monday morning, as we were hoping to beat the traffic.
My search was not going that well until, on Thursday afternoon, I located my pal inside a concrete support on the San Francisco Metro underground railway. As you can imagine, there are a lot of these pillars; it was a long and rather trying morning with the sledgehammer.
In the second leg, I was supremely confident. Yes, three and a half days was a tough target to beat, but I had the perfect hiding place in the Pacific planned, and felt I could hold out there for as long as necessary to claim victory.
Sadly, it was not to be.
'Difficult located me this morning after only thirty seven minutes.
He said something about stinky bubbles.
He's not called an evil genius for nothing.
Ah well. There's always next year.
Congratulations to iDifficult on his World Championship victory!
This blog entry is protected by copyright © Indigo Roth, 2010