Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Sweeping Up The Splinters

Whenever I hear a knock at the door, I never expect the Spanish Inquisition.

Thankfully, they're not there when I step away from my Godzilla marathon on TV to answer it. It's Ziva, Finland's answer to a very-tiny-but-important question. The diva gazes up at most of me from her tall heels. We've had dealings before, not least of which was what became known in hushed tones as The Istanbul Incident.

Roth! she beams, with something approaching tolerance, We need something from you! By "we" the crazy Finn means her and Mike, Colorado's long-lost Heir to the Dead-Letter Throne Of America. The duo have recently masterminded the 30 Days Of Photography Challenge.

I took part. I broke rules. I didn't care. Ziva told me in no uncertain terms that I was now On Her List. I have no idea what that means, but goshdarnit, it sounds interesting, doesn't it?

Ziva! I smile shyly.

You might be a slacker, my dear Indigo, she shrugs kindly, but we have need of your peculiar talents. As I look blankly at her, she chuckles, As someone very tall once said to me, It's Steam-Engines when it comes Steam-Engine-Time!

I consider this with all due solemnity for a moment.


Your outtakes, man! she smiles, somewhat worryingly. You promised us extra photos that you didn't use in the challenge!

I did?

You do remember, don't you?

She shakes her long dark hair and I forget my name for a moment.

So, when can we have them? Now is good.

I have visions of Vikings roaring across the frozen wastelands. I am caught in their bloodied headlights.

Oh, yes, of course. Well, you'd better come in then.

She tap-taps into my hallway and closes the door behind us.

I'll just turn Godzilla off.

There's no need. It turns out she's a fan.

So. Here's my spare photos.

And Instabul? Oh, it was cool. We made bail.

Day 13 – Calm 2

The Mathematical Bridge in Cambridge, sheltering a huddle of sleepy punts. I fail to see how it could get much calmer.

Day 25 – Video 2

This alternate take has some lovely footage of a very cheeky bird.

Day 27 – Kafkaesque 2

Folk struggled with this one. So I'm posting my second. I blame Mike, and so should you; he thought of the damned word.

Day 28 – Autumn 2

"The House was out of time. Every year new leaves fell, but inside their ring the House endured; it was changeless, lost."

Day 28 – Autumn 3

My final photo of this challenge. Weird, isn't it? My favourite tree in Cambridge.


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Monday, October 29, 2012

Dashing For The Line

Can you see it? Look, over there! The finishing line!

Okay, so here we are, poised for me to finish up on the 30 Days Of Photography Challenge. The mutant ankle-biter of bloggers Ziva and Mike, this challenge sets a different topic every day for a month; one topic, one photo, every day.

Two weeks ago, I did the first fourteen days as a single entry. Yes, I'm a foolish lad, with naked ambition.

Last week, I did another seven. Did you hear me roar?

And now, it's time for the back nine. Tiger Woods would be proud.

So now, we're almost done. It's been a blast, kids. By which I mean I feel I've been blown up, shot at, pushed through the wringer and roundly whipped in the course of the month.

But what is life without a few trials?

I Blame Ziva.

You know, I really must get that printed on a t-shirt.

Day 22 – Neutral

"High above the world, the moon looked down. She witnessed everything that happened in the howling dark, but offered no comment, opinion, or intervention. Truly she was a neutral presence."

Day 23 – Underwater

As the light of life faded, the last thing she saw was his face gazing down at her through the water.

Day 24 – M&Ms

Look, for once I have to blame Mike; I'm not foolish enough to blame Ziva for standing with my mouth open. No, Sir.

Day 25 – Video

Listen to the words, people. This line is mostly filler.

Day 26 – Heart

I visited my home town recently, and was dismayed to see much of its centre being demolished to make way for New Things. I was partly dismayed because I am a Mistruster of Things Unproven. But mostly it was because they were tearing the heart out of my town.

Day 27 – Kafkaesque

Look, if you don't understand, explaining it won't help. Like a dog!

Day 28 – Autumn

I'm rather proud of this.

Day 29 – The City

"Beneath a brilliant blue sky, the grey city toiled.
The sky wanted the people to look up, to feel inspired, but they did not.
They continued to look down at the grey tedium of their lives,
And the rough road beneath their feet."

Day 30 – Blackout

Kidnap victim? Kinkster? Or just really bad at putting a tie on?

The choice is yours.


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Wednesday, October 24, 2012

* A True Hiatus Nonsensica

This blog entry has been removed, revised and included in the romping sci-fi epic TESTAMENT: FUNNY BADGERS by Indigo Roth, Red Angel Publishing, 2013.

Its reference in the book is iDIFFICULT 4:1-43

Paperback and Kindle:
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Monday, October 22, 2012

More Bloody Weirdness

You begged me.

You pleaded.

But you know how I am; I'm going to do it anyway.

It's time again for a catch-up on the 30 Days Of Photography Challenge.

The challenge, the hideously-deformed offspring of bloggers Ziva and Mike, sets a different topic every day for a month; one topic, one photo, every day. Last week, I did the first fourteen days in one entry.

Hell yeah, I'm a rulebreaker.

Today? Another seven days. More bloody weirdness.

Actually (that most English of words), I rather like these. Of course, by the time you read this, I'll be behind everyone again; Ziva posts early, the young scamp.

So as ever, I blame Ziva. You can blame Mike if you like.

Anyway, here we go.

Day 15 – My Favourite Food

I was going to photograph it, honestly. But it was so hot and delicious, and demanded to be ravished.

Day 16 - Bullshit

There's important things going on in the world. But we're fed this shit. Bread and circuses.

Day 17 – Coins

The contents of my suit pocket. And it's a rare day; I'm carrying money. Yes, yes, and a nut; shiny, isn't it?

Day 18 - QWERTY

I admit it; I'm unconventional. And a fan of Godzilla; I'm sure I'm not the only one.

Day 19 - Steel

We all like shiny stuff. Even when blackened and tarnished. In the bathroom, though? Look, it works; go with it.

Day 20 - Nails

Yes, I had to squeeze hard to hang onto them; it ended up like a scene from HELLRAISER.

Day 21 – Broken

They're resurfacing my housing estate. Every day, a different road closure. The roads torn up again, bricks everywhere. Breaks my heart.


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Thursday, October 18, 2012

An Occasional Gritting Of Teeth

Time is not my own today.

You know how it is; work, family, badgers.

But before I headed off to bed, buoyed by the artistic success from the weekend, I wanted to share another piece of origami with you.

Fourteen cubes in a ring, from MODULAR ORIGAMI POLYHEDRA by Simon, Arnstein and GurkewitzI made this one a few years ago, when I was actively involved in the origami society here in the UK. Times changed, and circumstances meant I couldn't continue, which was a shame. However, while I was on board, a call went out for pieces to go on display in the Japanese Embassy in London.

Yes, quite. The Japanese Embassy in London!

This sounded like an amazing opportunity, a once-in-a-lifetime thing. So I put this one forward, and I was giddy to discover that it was accepted. So, for a week, this was included in a selection of the best origami that the UK had to offer. But in those terms, I am an insect. Some of the work displayed was inticate, beautiful, original. Mine merely needed patience and an element of graphic design.

Each cube is made from twelve interlocking pieces of paper, with three making one corner of the cube. Making two connecting corners was simple enough. Finishing a cube by adding the eighth corner was fiddly. Interconnecting two cubes meant assembling one while interlocking with another; gritting of teeth was occasionally required.

And finishing the loop? Ah heck, you don't wanna know.

I hope you like it. But believe me, the other work on show was better! I'm a hobbyist fiddler, those guys are artists.

But it's all relative, I suppose.

Whatever you can do artistically, creatively - be proud of it.

There will always be someone who wishes they could do what you can do.

Enjoy what's left of your day! Almost the weekend!


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Monday, October 15, 2012

Guile Hoves Into View

Crazy is as crazy does.

It’s yesterday. I'm having tea in the back garden. My friend Ziva, of Ziva's Inferno fame, has dropped by. We've known each other for what seems like years, and the tiny resident of Finland is comfortable enough to speak plainly.

Roth, you schmuck, she says, endearingly cuffing me round the head while standing on a box in four-inch heels, why haven't you been taking part in the 30 Days Of Photography Challenge?

It’s a good question. The challenge, the illegitimate brainchild of bloggers Ziva and Mike, sets a different topic every day for a month; one topic, one photo, every day. I like the idea, and enjoy photography, but don’t want to hand my blog over to it for over four weeks to do it.

I mumble something noncommittal and gaze somewhat shiftily at the blue sky through the trees.

Ziva’s having none of it, but she knows I'm a tough sell; some guile hoves into view. Indigo, why not do a catch-up entry at the weekend? she purrs amiably. Bless her, it almost sounds like a question. Game over.

Ziva even consents to a photo to get me started. However, as you can see, she's terribly camera shy.

 Pointing out where the camera is doesn't seem to help. But what’s that you say, dear reader?

Hey Indigo! Wowsers, what awesome hair Ziva has!

I know, right?!

So this is my catch-up. Fourteen days in one go. Run now, there’s still time.

Oh, the punchline? By the time I took the photos, Ziva had headed out for dinner with the house’s resident lion, King. I notice that my best necktie is missing.

What can I say? ZZ Top were almost right.

Every girl’s crazy about a sharp-dressed cat.

Day 1 - Shiny

 A metal peacock. Okay, tell me it’s not shiny.

Day 2 - Fast

 When the doctor says to go easy on the fast food for a few weeks, I have no choice but to fast. A few blueberries and raspberries? Think of it as Dinner.

Day 3 – Above My Head

 Sometimes you’re in the right place at the right time. Better yet, with a camera.

Day 4 - Sour

 It’s better on the Continent, but the UK Fanta Lemon still rocks.

Day 5 - Lotion

 Okay, not strictly lotion, but good for my hands.

Day 6 - Vibration

 Good grief, I think my teeth are shaking.

Day 7 - Craftsman

 “And He made an origami frog, an exquisite form from a single uncut square of Abaca fibre paper. And when He finished the intricate box pleating and shaping, He breathed life into it. And it jumped out of the window.”

Day 8 - Hair

 Some have it, some don’t. On the whole, as a guy, I like “with”.

Day 9 - Rules

 I don’t like Rules in general. I like Order. But in a car park, I like these rules just fine.

Day 10 - Stalker

 It waits, it watches. And when the time is right, it strikes. And takes it home as a present for its mother.

Day 11 - Heavy

 “It sat under sullen skies and in its stone, it knew the weight of its presence.”

Day 12 - Five

 The five best tools I own.

Day 13 - Calm

 Because Eternity is a long time, he insisted on quiet neighbours.

Day 14 - Secret

 My lease does not allow me to have pets. But between you and me, this dog shares my house. I’m not sure how the landlord would feel about my fish. Or my peacock.


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