Sunday, April 14, 2013

* Paper Towels And Assurances

This blog entry has been removed, revised and included in the romping sci-fi epic TESTAMENT: FUNNY BADGERS by Indigo Roth, Red Angel Publishing, 2013.

Its reference in the book is 2 ROTH 2:1-28

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This blog entry is protected by copyright © Indigo Roth, 2009-2014

27 comments:

  1. ah yes... this is the Indigo i know and love. benzocaine dear?

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    1. Hey Eolist! Lovely to see you! Ah, how well you know me. And yes please! With a coupla tabs of Fuckitol too, if you have some space! Roth x

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  2. I hope you left the poor woman a large tip.

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    1. Hey Jayne! Extremely! She couldn't stop grinning the second time, and led me to a flat, three-legged table. And brought it in a lidded take-away cup ;) Indigo x

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  3. Hari Om
    ...and he's back!

    "His shuffling feet are the shambling demise of civilisation." Now there's a line to conjure up many a tale!

    Sorry about the scalded legs though. Trust no permanent damage. Great writing Indigo. Have a fun Sunday. YAM xx

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    1. Namaste Yamini! You're too kind, madame, far too kind. The legs held up magnificently, but as a heavy and very tall lad, they should be use to extreme stress by now. And thank you, have a wonderful weekend! Indigo

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  4. That woman deserves more than the minimum wage. {And also to work for an employer who pays their fair dues in taxes}

    Welcome home! It's been a while brewing no doubt.

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    1. Hey Alistair! It was a local business; you'd never catch me in one of those overpriced homogenous coffee houses! *looks shifty* And thank you, it's good to be out of the cellar. Roth

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  5. Fantastic piece of writing. I was right there - being clumsy. Thanks, Indigo!!

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    1. Hey Jack! Thank you, tho clumsy is unknown to you, I'd imagine? Being able to sip a decent latte on the deck of a warship in a force 8 gale tales special skills, and you have them in spades. Arrrr! Roth

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  6. Before I reached the part of the second spill, I was imagining a second spill, intentionally done, to test the good nature and delightful service.
    Oh, and for a laugh.

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    1. Shawn, you are a bad man. Good to see you.

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  7. Ah... it's been too long without a spill, my friend! Hope your sabbatical has been productive so far!

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    1. Hey BoomBoom! Hopefully you've not taken any spills lately, either? It's always a pleasure to see you without a cast on. Roth x

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  8. Now that's some good service. And some great writing. Glad to see you again!

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    1. Hey Jenn! I have been shamefully absent, it's true. But I have a note from my mother. Indigo x

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  9. Oh, how I can relate! I am a clutz of the highest calibre. I once tripped and fell while standing absolutely still. Obviously, we could never go for coffee, my friend. I am glad to see you back here finally. I was starting to think I'd have to start another challenge. :-)

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    1. Hey Nicky! Oh, I know it well, believe me. And to show solidarity, if you need someone to cling onto while wearing some trickily tall heels, I'm your man x Indigo

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  10. This post made me roar! I am sofa king clumsy too. I have no business trying to be a part of regular society!

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    1. Hey Mia! I am embracing my inner klutz as my age creeps ever onwards. And thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed. Indigo x

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  11. I loved so much of this.

    "...bristling with paper towels and assurances about an imminent mop" was just the beginning of it.

    Your clumsiness has become our amusement. So be it. :-)

    Pearl

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    1. Hey PearlyGirl! I'm delighted that my quaint, ham-fisted Britishness hits the spot for you. And rest assured, this is not an isolated incident.

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  12. Oh dear! And here I thought I was clumsy! Poor Roth!!

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    1. Hey Kato! Thank you, my dear! "Clumsy is as clumsy does" as my Momma always says. But then she also says, "Roth! Shut the hell up!" Bless you, Indigo x

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  13. I think you should have had cake (no coffee). All your problems here? Solved.
    Loved this. Very, very well-written. Who'd have thought shuffling feet were really social commentary?

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    1. Hey Dawn! Ooooh, d'you know, I might suggest they start offering me that. In fact, several cakes and a glass of milk. No pesky caffeine. True dat, cherie! Indigo x

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  14. Is your crotch fully awake now?

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